Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
Thank God they found balloon boy, I was afraid that Michael Jackson was ordering take out from heaven.
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
Just found out I slapped a vegan in the face with meat last night.
There are too many people and smells in this elevator for my hangover to handle.
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
Him cheating on his girlfriend resulted in a $1500 hospital bill from repeated blows to his testicles by my ass. They diagnosed his pain as "testicle trauma". Sex karma at it's finest.
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
you know you've had too much sex when your vagina hurts when you laugh
If I got to choose how I die, it would be in an Olympic sized pool of gin and tonic.
There's a man with a stuffed dog and a can of dog food on the L. Should I break it to him?
Best not to. Some people need their delusions.
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
Florida is balancing how much this place sucks with how many vodkas you can have to cope in order to still be allowed on the plane to leave
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
Randomize
