Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
Just remembered throwing your phone at your face in a half-drunk stupor the other morning when your alarm went off. Thought I should apologize.
Can you tell me why I have pubes stuck in my teeth?
I swear to god I'm going to hunt down and stab the next telemarketer that calls from a blocked number while I'm waiting for my STD results...
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
He's prob getting laid right now and I'm sitting alone in my duct tape shoes.
you kept telling everyone how your ninja turtle shell also functioned as a backpack
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
I'll be there. With Doritos and whisky. Don't expect much more.
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
He probably thinks you're playing hard to get.
Hard to get?? I'm playing leave me the fuck alone.
it went well until I said "me" instead of "my" and he kept sexting me in character as a pirate
OH MY GOD YOU GUYS I JUST FOUND OUT I HAD PHONE SEX THE OTHER NIGHT
How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?
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