You can't be mad at me for wanting to drink though, it is the reason we're engaged
I wonder what it would be like to go to the dry cleaners and not have to inform them that all my clothes are stained with booze.
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
IT'S FRIDAY. So quit being a pussy, get out of bed, and come help me drink these 40s. That's not a request.
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
Tried to dry my shoes in the oven last night.
thanks for being my moral compass. and thanks for not always pointing north so i can be slutty and not feel bad about it.
I knew you would eventually ask my secret. Pedialite mix drinks. Works wonders.
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
Someone left me hummas on my door step between the hours of 1am-3am
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
It's days like today, when my bra and underwear match, that make me feel like I'm getting my life together...
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
Randomize
