So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
I had to steal sneakers from my man of the night. I dipped. But then realized I left my purse in his house. So I had to stash the shoes in some bushes and wait for him on the stoop. Then after he watches me leave, I run back and get the shoes cuz I didn't wanna be taking my hour long journey home through London at 3 pm in my six inch wedges and club dress
I'm so excited for post-beer fest chipotle. It will be better than scared shitless pre-go karting chipotle.
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
How is it that I know 4 different bartenders who won't charge me for drinks, but I can't get laid?
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
They want a bedroom just for their cats. And you thought we were gay.
Randomize
