So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
He fucking owes me dinner after I gave him head under the deck behind the bar.
i really need to stop putting makeup on my cats..
im eating kix cereal and taking shots by myself. please come hang out with me. im desperate
mom came into my room and asked to borrow some condoms. We have gotten to the point where it's not awkward anymore.
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
ask me again when I'm sobewr aka tuesday
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
Just realized my relationship wasn't even Facebook official and I'd already cheated on him. 'Shitty girlfriend' is an understatement.
I woke up this morning half naked, smelling like an ash tray, with an empty bottle of jack next to me, and now someone named Dora the anal explorer is texting me.
Phil and I agree that the level of sand in your vagina rivals that of many of the earth's largest deserts
I'm not talking about Donald Trump in the midst of sending you nudes
We lost. I'mma go home and drink more and do a face mask and wonder why it is that god put me on this Earth to suffer
he's figured out my code; what are you doing = I haven't found a better dick yet
Randomize
