What are you wearing to our high school reunion?
I don't know, What kind of dress says "I feel sorry for you people?"
good thing vaginas are great cup holders
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
all law school has taught me so far is how to fart quietly during lectures and how to out-argue the ice cream guy when he screws me out of extra toppings.
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
This is ridiculous. I’m in fucking college getting high off a potato.
Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww"
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
I rocked his world in the back of my car in an overly-lit, heavily trafficked parking lot. Middle age is amazing!
My ex's girlfriend just invited me clubbing. Guess who won the breakup?
My nipples are raw, I've yet to go to bed, I feel like death, and I'm at work. Thank you jack, crown, and Lafayette!
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