I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
Ever have the mailman look at you like youre a chronic masterbator. I have.
New Jersey isn't a real state, it's just a myth you tell little kids to scare them like Canada or Carrot Top
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
Uuh, dude you came running out of the bar screaming you didn't want to hear that song, ran face first into a truck, spun around 3 times and hit the sidewalk. I tried to catch you.
It was one of those you-have-no-other-way-home-and-we-already-made-out-so-I-guess-youre-coming-home-with-me-if-you-promise-to-leave-early kind of deals.
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
On a unprofessional note, there's a new girl in photo.
That wasn't unprofessional. The fact that I'm going to fuck her is unprofessional.
I'm just to the point my give a fucks is so far in the red that I'm going to have to take out a 30yr loan of fucks to repay it
You'd think it'd be fun living next door to a guy whose neck you once licked. Surprise, it's not.
WTF ARE YOU DOING IT'S FUCKING VEGAN COFFEE IT'S MADE WITH NUT MILK YOU'RE NOT A FUCKING SQUIRREL.
Randomize
