Did Neil Armstrong say the moon was too far away! NO! He built himself a fucking rocketship is what he did!
I haven't worn deodorant in like three days and have been laying around in my underwear listening to music and drinking. I think i've made my own Bonnaroo in my apartment.
and by charming I mean he has a horse cock.
Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
Remind me if I threw up on you last night or if that was just a dream.
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
In the middle of the State of the Union, she unzipped my pants and started giving me head. I've never been so proud to be an American.
Boobs speak an international language.
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
And I'm laying here struggling with the notion that I need to put pants on.
Randomize
