I hate seeing commercials about babies when i'm high
Yeah, I don't like babies at all
I thought spray tan was a myth
?
You know, something that only happens in Jersey
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
He lit his shirt on fire at the bar by putting a lit cigarette in the pocket to "save for later."
The bridesmaids just went smackdown on the floor, over the bouquet. I saw nipple. Best wedding ever
I keep finding coffee grounds in my vagina
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
The chlamydia really affected his face.
Should i put up a tasteful banner for your party that says last chance to sleep with maya?
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
You should have thought of that before emitting walrus sounds while intoxicated
You went into the bathroom, got in the tub with a pillow, yelled "this isn't as comfortable as it looks in the movies" then passed out
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
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