He booked his flight from Dallas already, no ticket to the game, said hes gonna bang some girl at tailgait to get a ticket, I had to explain that it will be sub 20 degrees F during tailgate, he decided to come in july instead, Texans are dumb.
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
Either call me back or tell me you're in jail. For fucks sake. If this is a cop, just help out. national league.
Whoever I saved in my phone as "Jackpot" last night has your keys.
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
So apparently the only parts of last night I remember didn't actually happen.. When did vodka become a hallucinogen?
I'm two sheets to the sexual wind
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
Fuck these runners passing me on campus as I'm waking to dinner. With my huggie. With flavored vodka and rum. Aka yum
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
He literally said I should watch game of thrones while I was blowing him like is this the conversation you want to be having right now
No one likes wet exercise unless it's vigorous sex in the shower
It was sweet, he carried me out of my bathroom after I passed out, built me a pillow fort so I wouldn't roll out of bed, set a glass of water on the table, and brought me a mixing bowl to puke in. Totally a sign we're more than just fuckbuddies.
Randomize
