Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
God you better not be texting me after just having sex with someone from craigslist
Not going out tonight. And so the 25 day drinking streak ends....
It's one of those mornings where you wake up and want to go to church for the first time in ten years. THAT shameful.
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
come home. I need you. I'm too hungover to deal with this hangover alone
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
I'm eating lunchables with a glass of wine while I FaceTime the guy I lost my virginity to.
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
Her ex was at the party her housemates were having. He knocked on her door asking how she was while we were going at it. Turns out they were trying to work things out. Don't think I'll ever forget his face when we walked out of her room.
He asked me to fly out to Seattle to participate in a week of marathon sex so I'm at the airport now. I'll call you when I get back.
bonging vodka is the same level of "good idea" as eating machetes
Randomize
