His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
I incognito puked under the VIP table. Did Jersey proud.
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
Tonight, a friend walked in and said "oh look at that. Drunk on the living room floor. Just as expected." this is my life. This is my life.
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
A group of drunk Marines just serenaded me, never leaving this place
You're not drunk til you wake your roommates up screaming at your ceiling fan
It's like my life is one of those movies where after a bunch of outlandish events that only happen in a movie the girl realizes her true life calling and lives a great life with a sexy man of multiple races. But I'm stuck in the fucked up part where 25 year olds come in their pants.
I am lonely and hungry. I need a girlfriend, but I'd settle for my mom.
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
Randomize