eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
i have a $600 bill for my ER visit in which they did nothing but suggest to me that i am an alcoholic.
If I had known I was gonna take my tights off and throw them over the balcony I would have shaved my legs.
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
guys with girlfriends don't have a leg to stand on when they get mad at you for fucking other guys
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
I call him Seabiscuit because he's my trusty steed
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
How do I tell my hairdresser I want a hair style I saw in a porn video?
I'm currently deliberating if I'm going to be too drunk on New Years to handle wearing false eyelashes.
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
Randomize
