Apparently married women at the office don't like getting congratulated on getting "knocked up"
you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
eating taco bell the same day as formal = probably a bad idea
My mom's mothers day present consisted of a card, chocolate and the rose bush I threw up in as I was getting in last night. She loved it.
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
You are not going to get a pat on the back from me for not fucking that 40 year old again.
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
I'm definitely not at Wal-Mart eating jalapeno poppers with an elevated blood alcohol content
SShout out to Barney the Dinosaur for teaching me how to sing the ABCs backward. I just scored a free pitcher.
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
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