We fish bowled my car and anna told us a story about time travel and part of it had people melted into the side of a boat and i imagined them being melted into my car moaning in pain and then we got scared and thought zombies were outside and couldn't leave for a while.
She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
Just took my morning after pill in the library
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
Besides. I seriously had a dream that George W Bush came over and slapped some tabs down on my kitchen counter and said "let's get juiced.". It was a sign to not get too fucked up
also i think i should join the bone marrow registration when im sober
Dude, I need a lifestyle change. I'm to old to be making out with chicks in foam parties, letting older chicks get all excited because I let them put their hands up my shirt, and running around doing scavenger hunts with 18 yr old chicks.
I told ya. I'm super awesome at making things super awkward. I'm the Awkwardnator.
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
Omg dude take a shower. You'll feel like god washed away all the sinful shit we did last night.
I just broke into my house with a butter knife. It kinda scares me just how easy that was.
I called him my big strong man today. It's all downhill from here. Matching Christmas sweaters, here we come
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