I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
Just got my period. I'm not pregnant with Scott's child and I won't be having any sex tonight. This must be what they mean by bittersweet.
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
I don't think of it as I'm taking a pole dancing class...its more like I'm making myself recession proof
One of those nights had to have been when we tried to walk through the McDonald's drive through -- and then got in the car with complete strangers. And stole their hamburgers.
He acted like he was sleep fucking because I woke up to him screwing me in the middle of the night and he had is eyes closed and was mumbling things the whole time and wouldn't respond to me.
Is that even possible?
I called him by the wrong name to test him and he instantly stopped, rolled over and acted like he was still sleeping...I think he might break up with me tomorrow.
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
Even worse we were making a sex tape so our reaction to the condom breaking was recorded.
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
I'm just letting you know right now in advance that if I die or go to the hospital or end up in jail tonight it's because your kid sold me mushrooms.
Randomize
