the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
she pinky promised me she was 18
You kept trying to throw the grocery cart off the balcony.
I was just informed that I have the perfect belly button for body shots... Best compliment ever.
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
You've never really lived until you tell someone you have an STD over snap chat.
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
I'm pretty sure I just won at life. I touched the bushy tail of a squirrel while he had his mouth full and was digging in a plant on campus. That is all.
So. My mom went grocery shopping for me while I was at work & brought the food here. Cool bc my dildo was laying on the counter. Forgot I left it out. I am sure she saw. Im mortified.
Randomize
