I just got fire extinguished by his roommate while we were having sex. That's just taking cock blocking to a whole new level.
Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
My last google search last night was 'vodka swimming pool'.
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
It's a gift. Kind of like morning wood in my brain.
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
I just think that exercising will really get in the way of my painkiller induced nap time rituals. There's gotta be a better way.
I swear, the cow we tried to tip tried to eat me. and all I could think was, oh how the tables have turned. worst trip ever
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Do you ever just want to be mashed potatoes?
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
Double high-fived his wife and her sister on the way out. If I'm not the best mistress ever tell me how.
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