Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
just watched paranormal activity stoned. laughed the whole time and screamed when they turned on the lights. eating doritos. I love my life
i guess i finally out drove tiger woods this morning..
I have to take his virginity. It's what God put me on earth for. It's my life mission.
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
I'm cleaning my apartment while naked. Anyone who says that's not why they want to live on their own is lying.
WHY WERE YOU COOKING NAKED?
WHY WERE YOU SLEEPING ON MY COUCH?
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
I wanted to give everyone gifts as they left the house... So when your wondering where most of the christmas ornaments are I'm really sorry.
Randomize
