Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
He woke up screaming about pickles. I think it's gonna be a good day.
sometimes i wish i was a boob, they get to chill in soft and cuddly little cup things.
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
Close your eyes and stop texting and think about puppies. You'll be fine.
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
Heb just said, and I quote, "let's go to Who's On Third and fuck a fishbowl with our mouths. I am going to fuck this van." and then he humped a van.
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
I woke up this morning with a text from my mom as to why the hell random people were showing up at the house. Turns out nobody came to our house party because I gave them my old address, fuck pre-partying for real
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
On a scale from 1 to total dick, how inappropriate is it to pick your boyfriend up from rehab with a hangover?
Just passed a girl holding a jar filled with what appeared to be diarrhea
It was like he was 23 all over again. Madness. I. was. so. scared.
I'm so gassy and it's your fault.
Randomize
