Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
You said I was the most beatiful preggers youve ever seen...im not pregnant
That girl you went home with last night was dressed in a bright blue sweats at the bar. 205lb Smurffete FTL. Boy were you in epic form.
That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....
It was the best sex i've ever had.
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
We see some guy emerge from the forest on the island this morning, alone, in only a snuggie. Morning shots and bagels on us for the number one walk of shame.
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
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