I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
no guy is ever going to take you seriously as a potential marriage prospect unless you learn to swallow
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
Never thought I'd say this but the maple syrup flavored vodka probably wasn't our best idea
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
But how MUCH of an emergency? Like, should I go to the ER now, or can it wait until after the bar crawl?
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
JUST BECAUSE I ANSWER THE DOOR NAKED CARRYING A BOTTLE OF RUM DOESN'T MEAN YOU CAN STARE NEIGHBORS.
Randomize
