Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
I'm about one sudden movement away from being able to cross "throw up in a fortune 100 company's bathroom" off my bucket list.
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
There's "red head", "preppy white girl" and "the two Asians I dated and now everyone thinks I like Asians"
Your dating history is like the united colors of Benetton
I thought i didnt really feel whatever i snorted last night until i just realized i think i asked this dude to punch me fight club style
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
She's blowing me while I'm watching air jaws. I love shark week.
Im sorry you'll never get the feeling of closeness when you go to pee outside and you realize you're peeing right where someone else just peed
Did I penguin dive down a hill last night?
You know when you're a kid and you play at the pool until you passed out? It was like that except instead of playing it was sex.
I think I may have gotten way too used to using my boobs as an extra hand/pocket...almost stabbed myself in the chin bc I forgot I put my fork there
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