no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
Watching the 1st game of the world cup. I'll drunk dial you at 8:30 to wake you up for work.
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
I'm crawling around naked in my room looking for my hairbrush. Just thought I'd put that image in your head.
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
He thought my hair would soak it up. I HAD TO CUT IT OFF.
All I do lately is eat steak, drink warm beer, watch porn, and avoid booty calls when I'm too lazy to take a shower. I think the apocalypse turned me into a dude.
Every person I've ever had sex with is in Chipotle right now.
My mom just told me I look like darth vader. how's your night?
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
I parked in the SAE Fraternity lot and left a note that said if you don't tow me you will all get a blowjob.
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
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