Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
That girl you went home with last night was dressed in a bright blue sweats at the bar. 205lb Smurffete FTL. Boy were you in epic form.
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
i tied my phone to a string attached to my bra. i am NOT losing it tonight
strip teases shouldnt end with an expensive car covered in salsa and mayonnaise yet here we are
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
I really need to curb my attractions to blondes with tattoo sleeves, firearms and alcoholism
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize
