is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
I'm so turned on right now it's fucking stupid. I hate burger king commercials
At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
I'm not trying to go crazy tonight either. I just want to go out, have a few drinks, meet up with my ex-boyfriend and get fingered or something.
He keeps asking me for girl advice, i told him im an expert at getting drunk, not girls
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
Rather than admit to myself he's hooking up with her right now, I choose to believe that he's not responding because he's masturbating to my picture, distraught over his poor choice, and trying to forget about the one that got away with a heavy dose of meth.
It's not meant to be. I also just shot a turkey baster of gin into Nate's eye, so....
When the shrooms kicked in we both simultaneously realized we were not the right puzzle piece for the dubstep puzzle.
We made eye contact and were like we are not welcome here, the ravers are onto us and we need to get the fuck out before we get shuffled upon
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
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