Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
false alarm. still invincible.
While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
If theres one good thing that came out of our relationship its this chicken recipe. And squirting.
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
You need to always be prepared. Like a sex firefighter.
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
I was so drunk last night dude. I woke up this morning to my oven being wide open and my pants on the kitchen floor.
Randomize
