It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
Just barfed in my hand. Needless to say, this day is off to a great start
there is a priest convention in the hotel. i feel like god is laughing at me.
I don't know how this happened but I got an email thanking me for being a Waffle House regular. HOW DO THEY KNOW?? Maybe I need to stop going there shitfaced.
Totally just asked Dad if I needed to show the real estate guy my tits so he would let us buy the house. I've really got to work on that filtering thing.
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
Oh shit I just realized the ropes are still tied to the bedposts
You had me at "mimosas" several texts ago.
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
It's like the blind leading the senile over here.
UPDATE: shit just got real- grandma is threatening to beat grandpa with a wooden spoon covered in chili.
To be clear, the next time I wake up with your dick inside me, I will reach down and grab one and squeeze until it pops like a grape. You've been warned.
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
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