this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
Four minutes until I can fart!
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
how do you ask an olympian for your underwear back?
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
Surveying the reception hall and I'm fearing the worst possible thing that could ever happen...this might be a dry wedding.
.,.,you might have to leave
I'm slowly starting to accept that you have to be a sociopath to be attracted to me
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize
