I'm lost and stupid without you.
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
Also, at 1:30 I emailed myself saying, "are you there Margaret? It's me, god"
Passing out is just my bodies way of protecting my liver.
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
You had a hot dog outside the bar then made me stop at McDonald's for a double quarter pounder. I'd say you've more than filled your drunken meat quota.
Gold rum. Strong marijuana. Jabba the Hut in stilettos. Deep thigh bruise. Yes, thal all happened. Sorry dude.
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
How is your new roommate working out
We are drinking at the laundromat. And will probably have sex later. So...pretty good.
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
The dick lei will go down in squad history
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
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