He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
Every time my boyfriend threatens to commit suicide I change my relationship status as "widowed".
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?
He gave me a book last time I slept there. Im beginning to feel like a really weird hooker. Like instead of money he gives me random shit he has lying around. like hamburger buns
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
Dad, is it in any way illegal for me to run around throwing handfuls of lucky charms at people tomorrow?
you're kidding right?
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
I went to the obgyn with chipped nail polish.. Somewhere Beyonce was looking down, shaking her head, whispering "Not fierce."
Oh my god I'm in a public bathroom with a space heater. I never want to leave
Pretty sure we ruined a bachelorettes life last night
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
Randomize
