This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
I had a long pep-talk with my penis that ended in "I love you, I'll try harder and I'm sorry."
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
don't care how drunk i am. my dick was like "nope, not doing it, you can't make me and i was like oh yes i can"
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
In the morning he said my plan to make 2 casseroles today was, "hot in a grandma sort of way," & I didn't think it was weird. THAT'S how hot he was.
It's all fun and games until you rupture a testicle
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
I STUDIED GEOGRAPHY I KNOW THIS SHIT!! DON'T YOU DARE QUESTION MY AUTHORITY ON GLACIAL DEPOSITION AGAIN BITCH!!
Stop saving videos when you’re using my pornhub account!!! My girlfriend just tried to finger my butt because she thinks I’m into that
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