he confessed his love for me, threw up on my pillow and then fell asleep on said pillow. i met him last night.
better than last weekend. things are really looking up for you.
Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
Error 1684C: You're last text was undeeliverable. Subscriber is our to the aera.
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
the first call I got in the morning was from visa fraud prevention so yeah it was one of those nights
the bouncer made me realize that puking in line does not get you in any faster
I am eating deep fried cinnamon rolls and I found a lighter in my sprinkles. I miss you.
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
I changed his name in my phone to "Irrelevant" last night. Not changing it back.
why did you put a dildo on the ceiling fan
the dildo had a suction cup and we had a ceiling fan what did you expect?
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
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