and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
The bruises are from paintball. The money is from me being awesome
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
We just won 1800 at the casino and are going to the strip club. Who gives a fuck if it's 5pm
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
what the fuck is wrong with you
Do you want me to go chronologically or alphabetically?
This may be the most redneck thing I've ever said, but I know all there is to know about farting dogs
Randomize
