The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
she went home with me because she said i reminded her of paul rudd. remind me to thank him for his awkwardness
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
My mouth already tastes like senor cuervo took a piss in it and it's barely 1 am
I'm staying in tonight, it's my Christmas present to my liver.
No no, there's drunk and then there's 'spooning with lawn gnomes' drunk.
Oh my god i hate key west. No one takes amex and strippers took all my money
my ex logged me out of his netflix so im gonna fuck his bestfriend as revenge
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
Bitch how dare you drink my dos equis
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
Randomize
