She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
My 11 year old cousin is wearing a Jane Austen fan club t shirt. I'm trying not to tear into her, but I'm five coronas deep and losing control.
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
There's nothing worse than waking up naked on the beach covered in sand and a family walking by.
I'm lowering my standards just so I can get laid, but I draw the line when a guy spells cool kewl
I've been laying here all day wondering why my back hurt so bad and then I remembered last night.... When you pushed me through that glass table.
I know it basically makes me the worst feminist ever, but I don't want to kill my own spiders. And I will pay my personal spider hit man with sammiches and unlimited , uninhibited access to my vagina.
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
And I made some girl take out the trash, load and unload the dishwasher, swifter, and clean the counters. So don't act like I don't do anything.
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
See that doesn't work because we've had sex so its awkward for you to call me mom
Randomize
