I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
so i woke up to her 8 year old asking for a bowl of cereal...
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
i turned my shower on this morning and passionfruit pulp came out. how did you even do that?
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
Randomize
