chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
im using old socks as coasters. im going to make a great housewife.
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
I'm drinking away my Christmas cash. People are going to get bar receipts as presents.
I found her sitting in the shower having an argument with the dolphins on the shower curtain.
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
My walk of shame this morning would have been much less obvious if it hadn't been 6:30 in the morning and I wasn't walking through downtown Nashville in a Steeler jersey.
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
He was humming "here comes Peter cottontail" while unbuttoning his pants. Happy Easter to me
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
Chick in the reindeer getup puked on Baby Jesus last night. But then she bought us all empanadas so she's cool.
Had a dream I dropped the L word and immediately threatened to kill myself
You probably shouldn't be having nightmares about expressing affection
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
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