I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
I found a vibrator in my car and it's not mine...this is becoming a weird day.
Do you relize what downtown will be like this week? Like open season. But instead of deer its hot baseball players from all over the country that we'll never have to see again. I swear the college world series is a gift from god.
And this is the part where I need you not to judge me. Remember that I have never seen a penis do that and that I have a weird sexual curiosity
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
Stop calling my penis "Fat Jesus"
I'm in my math teacher's garage hiding right now because I fucked his son last night. It's fine
I think I just found my soul mate...he's wearing a zebra striped onesie and is into Michael Jackson...I'll explain in the morning.
He updated Facebook... "Got a new phone today." WHAT ABOUT THE FUCKING KID YOU HAD?!
Randomize
