i don't plan on having that self control this summer
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
Today was the day I stopped kidding myself and started buying the handle of vodka.
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
I just put on eyeliner and a diff shirt in case the pizza guy is cute. This is what my dating life has come to
Just called the consul general of France "dude"
He burnt his arm on the grill, then turned around and started blaming it on the burger buns...I think it's safe to say he's drunk.
At this point i guess a traditional, non-life-threatening pity fuck is too much to ask for
He was an asshole the entire night and then tried to touch my dick in a Michaels craft store.
Sooooo, no second date?
Do you have pictures of my pancakes
I need to show the world
They are the pancake equivalent of eventual wife
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
Randomize
