do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.
I'm about to take my first shit since thursday. I'm scared. pray for me. If I don't make it, tell my family I love them.
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
One of the bamboo sticks broke and impaled him. I think he's drunk enough that it shouldn't hurt until tomorrow.
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
I just remembered that I did shots out of a gay mans crotch. And there's someone saved in my phone as "Miranda knows where my car is"
You're the only person I know who could blow literal chunks, laugh about it, then proceed to shotgun another beer. Love you champ.
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
I knew things were bad when my gyno recommended meditation.
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
wtf guys I thought we agreed on no more knives. So much for not destroying the house
passed out on bart again and decide to bike home. biked thru a goat farm of angry goats, biked on the freeway, got stopped by the cops, and sat shotgun in the squad car while the officer driving got a video on his iphone of his partner riding my bike on the freeway.
Randomize
