wake up i wanna do it froggy style
watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
My sober self will be embarrassed tomorrow. For now I am laughing my ass off.
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
It was 3 am when she drunkenly tried to deep-fry a banana.
How'd she do that?
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
Hate my fucking roommates.... Seriously, who the FUCK peels potatoes in the bathroom sink?!
Did I tell you about the swingers? Because I think they're trying to trap me.
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