he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
Life is so much better when you know you're gonna get laid soon.
you fell asleep spooning with his golden retriever. im not sure if thats more degrading for you or the dog
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
FOund a bunch of old fireworks spring cleaning.
Who is our new insurance provider?
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
We got drunk and crashed a fifty year old woman's birthday party for the food. Whoops.
You would seriously think I would remember who put themselves in my phone as Burt Rynalds Moustache, but I don't. And I need to be reminded of who you are so I can give you a proper high five.
Hey Cat, it's Michael. You made out with me for a hot dog last night and I feel super used.
In honor of Super Tuesday, we should have the sex tonight.
He said he couldn't fuck me cause I kinda looked like my brother
Randomize
