I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
Is my tampon string too long for this dress?
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
Yeah, I think they knew. I smelled like that telltale combination of strippers and Easter.
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
No one ever gets any after sleeping with her. She is like the broken mirror of hookups, enjoy 7 years of blue ball. Don't say I didn't warn you
Only in my life does a conversation about Hanukkah lead to sexting
Every minute you wait for the sex that's not gonna happen, we're missing a tone deaf, drunk, tard-asaurus rex half-sing a 90's song to a bunch of other dinotards at karaoke.
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
My guy issues hinge on tonight's game. Caps win, it's Dustin. Rangers win, Josh. I even flipped a coin to see who got what team
Okay so I've been talking to the mice again and they agree with me that you're a piece of shit.
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
I'm both gender and math confused
Randomize