i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
Should I shave my pubes in the shape of a top hat so I can nickname my junk Abe Lincoln?
We went to the police station completely hammered looking for you. Don't tell me I'm not a good friend.
Nothin says happy bday jesus like a shot with your loved ones.
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
My sheer presence has sent the hipsters running in terror. I expect no problems.
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
Every Easter every single one the baby Jesus butt plug comes up
Dude, you were so drunk you were hanging from the ceiling of my car pretending you were a sloth while we were on 81.
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