white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
a girl walking in front of me just packed her cigarettes 72 times and yes i counted
how much adderall did you take today?
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
just got invited to smoke a bowl by a guy who has a prostetic leg and has been on the jerry springer show multiple times. I love my life right now
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
If you don't ever hear from me again, just know that I loved you
Jesus Christ that's like a real possibility
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
She invited me to Bikini Yoga with her friends. Sounds promising.
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
I am at a point in my life where I don't want to brush my teeth for my tinder date because toothpaste and martinis don't mix.
One day no one will want to send me dick pics so by all means keep 'em coming
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
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