I just met lou reed's venus in furs. Her hands are slippery.
I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
and in the morning, while we were eating breakfast, she was all " i think someone sneezed into my shirt..." she'll never know.
you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
Note to self. Don't order a $10 bottle of wine on a 40 min flight because it seems like a good deal.
God you're perfect.
I am. So drunk right now. Good work, Frontier.
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey?
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
I slept naked with a towel wrapped around my waist in case I pissed the bed again
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
Of course he did! You’ve seen my tits, you know he didn’t stand a chance!
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