You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
final count. 18 beers. 4 shots baileys. 2 shots vodka. 1 glass champagne. vomited in the yard after losing my phone in a field for 8 hours. Possibly played tag with myself
Wtf. Who made this Big Mac, Helen Keller?
my goal in life is to wake up with my underwear on
halloween makes it hard to decipher real cops... from sexy men dressed up as them.
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
i have wind burn on my face from my head hanging out the window of the cab vomitting
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
I swear the pregnant cashier was jealous when I bought my plan B
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
Blacked out last night, but left myself a note that said "oops on oops on oops" that can never be a positive
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
Why can't burritos get me drunk
I have to charm this cab driver. Hold on.
Randomize
