how do I set my phone to only ring when I'm asleep when sex is certain?
he keeps his weed in a birkenstock shoe box. its like, we get it, youre from oregon.
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
We lost you in the mall, but to no surprise we found you waiting in line to sit on santas lap. You said you wanted to ask him for a pound of weed and a subway giftcard for xmas.
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
I could have been on my second lucrative divorce by now, but nooooo, I had to be a strong independent woman.
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
Apparently I told him the people made me order taco bell I didn't even want it. And then proceeded to turn off all the lights and sit at the kitchen table in the dark and told him not to look at me.
And I broke things off with Justin last night. Except I texted him while he was asleep and then I was like well, that's probably not what he wants to wake up to, so I sent him a picture of the coconut I microwaved and caught on fire when I was really high one time.
Randomize
