I think I am morally bankrupt
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
there was enough confetti in my bra to throw another NYE party
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
You were walking around with a baby carrier pretending your vodka was a baby. You tried to get pictures on santas lap
i just went 2 months without giving head... thats like two months without coffee. or two months without sun.
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
When nipples stop being hilarious I'll stop getting them out in public.
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
Everyone thinks it's an okay idea now until I'm overdoing it on the vodka/clubs, dancing on a table, trying to make out with the groom.
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
Randomize
