Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
Take this only to mean that we love you, but we're having a serious, half-hour, hypothetical discussion about how far we think we could throw you.
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
Apparently, his doctor was impressed with how well we took care of his leg. We're like the kings of naked triage.
I don't think my body can handle the alcohol I want to put in it anymore.
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
My roommates just built a mini golf course upstairs while I was sleeping.
I woke up this morning to a lot of blurry photos of a swan i must have chased down the riverbank and a handbag full of loose haribo.
I actually just took 17 pictures of some guy at the gas station that needs to marry me now
I woke up and discovered I gave new meaning to the term "pizza pockets" yes it's exactly like it sounds like
we should definitely drink gin again. soon.
the bartender goes "wow its so good to see you sober" and gives me a hug
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
The cop told you he couldn't let you pee. You just pulled your pants down and squared anyway and im surprised you didnt get arrested.No more drinking for you.
Randomize
