I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
I found a digiorno pizza in my washing machine.
Tell nick i'm sorry for throwing a block of cheese at him last night
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
I can only send "I want your dick" texts to so many guys before I accidentally over-book myself. I need a day planner.
My New Years Resolution is to get everyone to start talking like a 40 year old douchebag. From now on, you will only refer to me as Chief.
I was going to ask the people in the kitchen to keep the volume down, but they're cooking pasta at 3 AM and one complimented me on my polka-dot nightgown. They're high. No volume control.
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
Randomize
