Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
A true measure of a good friend is how long she responds to her friends drunken illogical texts. Youre a champ.
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
If you hit me with your dick and make light saber noises we are breaking up. I don't care if it's your birthday, you are not a sex Jedi.
So is singing the star wars theme as I put the condom on off limits?
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
When he wakes up tomorrow with half shaved legs smelling like a preteens bathroom, I'm sure he will think he has had a great evening
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
I dare you to find another dealer that delivers bud to your home along with deep fried vegan burritos
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
Randomize
